The Heart Before the Head: How Jesus Invites Us to Express Our Grief and Questions

There is a moment in Scripture that reveals the gentle, patient, and intentional nature of Jesus like few others. After His resurrection, Jesus did not first appear to the disciples or the crowds. Instead, He appeared to a woman standing outside an empty tomb, weeping. This woman was Mary Magdalene. Her tears were genuine, her grief profound, and her understanding limited. Despite walking with Jesus for years, she could not recognize Him in this moment of transition. What Jesus did next is remarkable: He listened. He let her speak. He allowed her heart to be fully revealed before opening her understanding.

This pattern of Jesus engaging the heart before revealing deeper truth appears repeatedly after the resurrection. John 20:11–18 offers a beautiful glimpse into this divine approach. This blog post explores how Jesus invites us to express our grief and questions, showing that true revelation comes after relationship, not before.

Jesus Draws Out the Heart Before Opening Understanding

Mary Magdalene’s encounter with Jesus at the tomb is a powerful example of how Jesus prioritizes the heart. She stood crying, confused, and convinced that someone had taken Jesus’ body. Her emotions were raw, and her assumptions were based on fear and loss. She spoke openly about her pain and confusion.

Jesus did not interrupt or correct her immediately. He listened fully. He already knew what she would say, yet He allowed her to express her heart completely. This moment shows that revelation settles deeper when the heart is poured out first.

This approach is not unique to Mary. On the road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13–31), Jesus walked with two disciples who were confused and disheartened. He listened to their questions and doubts before opening their eyes to the truth. Later, when Jesus appeared to the disciples behind closed doors (Luke 24:45), He waited until after their conversation to open their understanding.

The lesson is clear: God desires more than intellectual understanding. He seeks a heart posture that is open, honest, and vulnerable.

Revelation Comes After Relationship, Not Before

Mary’s failure to recognize Jesus was not because He was unrecognizable. Instead, God had not yet opened her spiritual eyes. Understanding is not just intellectual; it is deeply spiritual.

Jesus did not reveal Himself by sight first. He revealed Himself through relationship. He met Mary in her grief and confusion, allowing her to express her feelings fully. Only after this did He gently open her eyes to who He truly was.

This teaches us that spiritual insight often follows emotional honesty and connection. When we bring our true feelings, doubts, and questions to God, He meets us there. He does not demand immediate understanding or faith. Instead, He invites us into a relationship where our hearts can be heard and healed.

The Importance of Expressing Grief and Questions

Many people struggle with grief and unanswered questions, especially in times of loss or transition. Mary Magdalene’s story encourages us to bring these feelings to God without fear or shame.

• Grief is real and valid. Mary’s tears show that sorrow is a natural response to loss. Jesus honors that grief by listening.

• Questions are part of faith. Mary’s confusion and assumptions reflect her honest struggle to understand what happened. Jesus welcomes those questions.

• God values our honesty. Instead of rushing to correct or rebuke, Jesus allows space for the heart to be fully revealed.

  
  

When we express our grief and questions openly, we create space for healing and deeper understanding. This process strengthens our relationship with God and prepares us for the revelation He wants to give.

Mary Magdalene weeping outside the empty tomb, symbolizing grief and revelation

Practical Ways to Bring Your Heart to God

Following Jesus’ example, here are some practical ways to express your grief and questions to God:

• Find a quiet place to pray honestly. Speak to God as you would to a trusted friend. Share your pain, confusion, and doubts without holding back.

• Write down your feelings and questions. Journaling can help you process emotions and clarify your thoughts.

• Seek community support. Sometimes sharing your heart with others who care can bring comfort and insight.

• Be patient with yourself. Understanding and healing take time. Allow your heart to unfold naturally.

• Listen for God’s response. After expressing your heart, be open to the ways God might reveal Himself—through Scripture, prayer, or the encouragement of others.

  
  
  
  

How This Pattern Shapes Our Faith Journey

Jesus’ approach to Mary Magdalene invites us to rethink how we relate to God during difficult times. It reminds us that faith is not about having all the answers immediately. Instead, it is about bringing our whole selves—our doubts, fears, and hopes—to God.

This pattern encourages a faith that is:

• Authentic: Honest about struggles and emotions.

• Relational: Focused on connection rather than just knowledge.

• Patient: Willing to wait for understanding to come in God’s timing.

• Healing: Allowing space for grief to be expressed and transformed.

  
  

By embracing this approach, we grow in a faith that is resilient and deeply rooted in relationship.